I had a dream last night that Arsene Wenger was doing a speaking tour, and for some reason he wanted to interview me on stage. I was all ready to go, in the auditorium and everything, but somehow I was then outside and I'd flung his favourite scarf halfway up a tree. He got really upset and started to cry, so I robbed a car and gave him a lift back to his hotel which was also halfway up a tree. I could find nowhere to park. Fun times in the Champions League last night, in one of the games anyway, where Ajax went to the Bernebeu and knocked out Real Madrid with a sensational 4-1 win. I know how much we still love our 1-0 there, so that's a result they're going to enjoy for a long, long...
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